I knew I wanted to give breastfeeding a good go and did a little research whilst pregnant but I was quite naïve to what actually went into it.
I harvested Colostrum (there’s a post about this on my Instagram grid) at around 38 weeks as I knew I was having a planned C-Section . I managed to get 5 syringes.
Once Tommy was born he just knew what to do, the midwives helped with the latch but luckily he just took to it really well, I felt like a pro and he fed and fed and fed. This quickly became exhausting alongside recovering from surgery, we spent 2 nights in hospital and one of the nights a midwife offered to take Tommy for a couple of hours so I could rest and she would give him the colostrum syringes they had from me, her exact words were ‘I’ll give him a couple, it will be like a full English breakfast for him and then he will sleep”. The whole time I could hear him wailing, she’d brought him back after about an hour and had given him all 5 syringes but he still wanted more so back to the boob it was.
I really took advantage of my time in hospital and asked so many questions about breastfeeding and got a lot of support and advice to then take away with me. I would strongly recommend doing this if you wish to breastfeed.
My nipples really hurt for 7-10 days. They had red sore patches on them and when he first went on to feed it would make me wince but one day it just stopped hurting - a good latch is important for this and I used Lansinoh nipple balm constantly. About day 3/4 “your milk comes in” I didn’t know what this meant but it’s basically when the colostrum becomes more like actual milk. My boobs went huge and solid like two footballs and for someone only used to small boobs this felt very strange. I used the silicone ‘Haakaa’ pump (image below) to relieve some of the pressure that was building up. Also, around this time I got out of the shower like normal and as I was getting dry my husband shouted, ‘your boobs are leaking’. I looked down and he was right, they really were dripping milk onto the floor. I was not prepared for this, but with hindsight I should have realised there was a reason I’d purchased breast pads. It’s also important to have a handful of good maternity bras.
When I fed my boobs went down in size each time but I found they soon filled back up and were uncomfortable so I would put the pump on and apply pressure/massage the solid sore bits to make myself comfy again and prevent any blockage/mastitis! Also massaging in a warm shower helps relieve any pressure. As much as the pump gives a feeling of relief it’s important not to overuse as your body would think your baby is needing the extra milk and as a result will continue to produce even more causing a vicious cycle of oversupply. The day my milk came in was tough, lots of cluster feeding and upset (all round), also Tommy was pooing a lot and we thought he was poorly but looking back I think his tummy was just clearing out and adjusting to the new milk as appose to colostrum.
Day 10 we had another difficult day, apparently this is common and is due to a growth spurt so feeding is excessive and another point in time a lot of people choose to stop. If I was going to stop at any point (before I actually did) it would have been day 3,4 or 10! Looking back I expressed too much too soon as felt like I had loads but that just stimulated my supply and told my body I needed more than actually did. This resulted in full, sore boobs and fast flow. At around 6 weeks I started trying to reduce my supply. There’s something called “let down” I noticed it a couple of weeks in and had no idea what it was until it was actually happening. It’s a tingly feeling in both boobs when you start a feed and your body/breast sends milk outwards, when I got this I had to take him off for a few seconds as the milk literally sprays out and makes him cough/splutter and take in wind. Some people cope fine though, I think mine was so fast due to oversupply. Let down can also happen randomly when not feeding, some women experience it when they hear a baby cry for example.
During my breastfeeding journey we were in full lockdown so I was dealing with all this in the comfort of my own home, I would have found the milk spraying very difficult to deal with out and about as I needed the silicone pump, collection pots and muslins for every feed. This was also closely followed by Tommy bringing lots back up due to reflux. Basically, our living room was covered in breastmilk for a good few weeks. In addition I don’t think random strangers would have appreciated a spray of breastmilk in their direction.
I learned that there are two phases of milk, foremilk and hindmilk. When baby first goes on it’s more or a watery substance and thirst quenching, after a while of feeding it gets fattier. I’ve was told not to worry about how much of each they get as they will drink until satisfied and all of it is full of goodness so try and think in the same way otherwise you could get really hung up on it causing un-needed anxiety. If you express and store the milk in pots you will be able to see the difference when the milk settles.
At about 6 weeks in I tried a sling/carrier that was loaned to be by a friend and OMG I should have done it sooner. He loved it. Burped lots just being upright then slept well in it and even stayed like that while I ate tea and got some jobs done. I used the Close Caboo, there are loads on the market and a top tip is to find a video on YouTube on how to use/wear.
Around 8 weeks in after lots of tough days and nights we discovered Tommy had reflux, it was then I decided to exclusively pump and feed using bottles, this allowed us to use infant Gaviscon in the milk and also took away the fast flow/over supply issues too. This was the best decision for us at the time as within days we had a much happier baby. It also worth saying that for weeks Tommy had an umbilical hernia, we hadn’t linked this to the feeding and reflux but within a couple of weeks of me taking him off the breast it started to dramatically reduce and we believe it was being caused/emphasised by the amount of pressure and wind in his little Tummy from the rapid feeds. He would take a full feed in about 1-2 minutes. At 11 weeks my flow/supply had still not settled down (I have history of high prolactin hormone so potentially this was impacting me) but as much as we had a happier baby due to bottle feeding I wasn’t a happy Mum. Exclusively pumping was so time consuming as it’s in addition to actually giving the feed, pumping needs to be done day and night and then there’s the sterilising of all the equipment too. Perhaps it would have been different if it wasn’t lockdown (March/April 2020) and we could have visitors and more support but it was just Me, Ian and Tommy trying our best in very testing times with my Mum on FaceTime doing what she could from afar.
As soon as I was set on the decision to stop a weight was lifted instantly and I knew it was the best decision for me and us as a family. As much as breastmilk is recommended and full of fabulous nutrition and antibodies I am so glad and proud that I put my mental health first as my baby needed a happier and healthier Mum and no harm has come to him as a result of me stopping. He is now 2.5 years old and thriving. Tommy’s reflux continued and he ended up being prescribed a low dose of omeprazole which he stayed on for a number of months.
Notes and Tips:
· You are not alone if you are finding it hard.
· Partners can find it difficult to know how to help and take the pressure off the Mum when they are unable to feed, they can support in other ways such as winding, nappies, holding, providing food and drinks for you, bathing etc.
· You will be very hungry and thirsty. Keep your food and drink intake up, I used to make a picnic to take upstairs and eat during the night. – A sandwich, biscuit, water, cup of tea in a flask, crisps, cereal bars.
· Don’t beat yourself up or add pressure to yourself if you are unable to breastfeed or choosing to stop.
· If you do wish to breastfeed but are experiencing difficulties there are great support services out there, some are listed on the ‘Support’ page on this website or you could Google what’s happening in your area.
· A breastfeeding pillow is a good idea to help take the weight of your baby and support your shoulders/back.

COLOSTRUM





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